Everything in Australia Is Trying to Kill You: A Tribute to Aussie Monster Movies

Australia is home to numerous terrifying creatures to strike fear into your soul. Deadly snakes and spiders. Ferocious crocodiles and sharks. A jellyfish whose venom can kill a human in two minutes (I wish I were kidding). The rapping kangaroo from Kangaroo Jack. Russell Crowe. It’s always been a running gag everything in my native homeland is trying to kill you.

As fun as it is to imagine international tourists genuinely shaking in fright at the thought of encountering deadly animals the moment they land in Australia, you’re highly unlikely to come face-to-face with most of these beasties during your vacation. As someone who has lived here for three decades, I can assure you I’ve only ever seen most of these killer creatures at Australian zoos than in my backyard.

That’s not to suggest these animals aren’t lurking out there somewhere. You’ll find them if you look hard enough. It’s just they’re generally completely uninterested in attacking you, especially if you leave them the hell alone. Statistically, you’re more likely to die in Australia from falling out of bed than being eaten by a shark.

Naturally, that hasn’t stopped Australian cinema from perpetuating the myth of the dangers of our local wildlife through numerous monster horror films, each starring a local menace ready to slaughter anyone who comes in their path. In honour of the spooky season, let’s take a look at a few killer Aussie monster movies.

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RAZORBACK (1984)/BOAR (2017)

The original Aussie monster movie by which all others are measured is undoubtedly 1984’s cult classic Razorback. While there has never been a recorded death in Australia by virtue of wild boar attack (yes, I actually double-checked this), this film certainly made plenty think twice about these seemingly innocuous creatures.

The film’s opening set-piece featuring a gigantic wild boar literally crashing through a house and stealing a baby from his crib is said to have been inspired by the infamous 1980 disappearance of Azaria Chamberlain, whose mother Lindy was accused of murder after she declared a dingo ate her baby. The entire film played on the conceit the Australian Outback was filled with all manner of creatures just waiting to devour your innocent children.

In his directorial debut, director Russell Mulcahy brought much of his experience directing music videos to this slick production, which was aided by the groundbreaking use of Kodak’s fast film stock that gave the film a surprisingly level of high-resolution. Mulcahy’s set-pieces are filled with vibrant colours and sharp editing, while his use of prosthetics and animatronics were genuinely ahead of their time. It’s a landmark moment in Australian cinema that all horror fans need to see.

In 2017, writer/director Chris Sun attempted to re-create the magic of Razorback with his take on the bloodthirsty wild boar narrative, Boar. While it’s far from a shot-for-shot remake, everything here feels terribly derivative of what Mulcahy created. It has its moments (namely the casting of Wolf Creek‘s John Jarrett) and it’s impressive to see Sun also rely on practical-effects to drive the horrors, but it pales in comparison to the film that set the benchmark back in 1984.

ROGUE (2007)/BLACK WATER (2008)

Every now and then, two staggeringly similar films are released in the same year, which must be an absolute nightmare for filmmakers and studio executives. Think Armageddon and Deep Impact or A Bug’s Life and Antz. In late 2007 and early 2008, Australian cinema had not one, but two horror films centred on a gargantuan, man-eating crocodile.

While the late Steve Irwin had spent the better part of the early millennium educating audiences on the idea crocodiles were to be respected and not necessarily feared, Rogue and Black Water took that one step further by highlighting how crocodiles were fiercely territorial animals and attacks on humans were merely the result of foolish mortals entering their dominion.

But each film took a different approach in crafting their killer creatures. While Greg McLean‘s Rogue utilised a robotic crocodile and cutting-edge CGI that ultimately won its production crew an AFI Award (the Australian Oscars) for Best Visual Effects, co-directors David Nerlich and Andrew Traucki spent two weeks shooting footage of real saltwater crocodiles to ingeniously splice into scenes for Black Water. It’s fascinating to watch both films back-to-back and compare which is more effective.

With a bigger budget and a cast featuring well-known names like Michael Vartan, Radha Mitchell, Sam Worthington, John Jarrett, and a young Mia Wasikowska, Rogue ultimately earned more attention than its indie rival Black Water, but they’re both wonderfully entertaining and thrilling little films. While we’re naturally meant to sympathise with the plight of the hapless humans attempting to escape the jaws of the menacing crocodiles, both films manage to twist your empathy towards the beasts who were doing little more than protect their homes.

BAIT 3D (2012)

Released towards the tail-end of the 3D craze, Bait is a harmless piece of ridiculous fluff with an ingenious premise that plays like a strange cross between Deep Blue Sea meets The Mist. After a freak tsunami forces a group of survivors to take shelter atop the shelves of a supermarket, they’re soon stalked by two enormous great white sharks who’ve been inadvertently washed ashore by the waves and trapped in the supermarket’s aisles.

This so-bad-it’s-good romp features a cast of young Aussie actors who now call America home (Xavier Samuel, Alex Russell, Phoebe Tonkin, Sharni Vinson) and veteran actors like Julian McMahon, Martin Sacks, and Dan Wyllie, who’ve clearly been cast in a woeful attempt to add some gravitas amongst the silliness.

Look, I’m not going to lie and tell you Bait isn’t an awful film. The dialogue is atrocious and the acting isn’t much better. And the less said about the hokey 3D special effects, the better. But director Kimble Rendall seems to know he’s crafting a B-movie and leans heavily into the ridiculousness of this film’s premise. If you can leave your brain at the door, Bait can be a hell of a lot of fun.

The death scenes are pretty fabulous and there’s some terrifically claustrophobic tension crafted by the film’s supermarket setting. Rendall mostly avoids the use of CGI, instead using animatronic sharks that look far more realistic than anything this low budget horror could have cooked up with computers.

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Author: Doug Jamieson

From musicals to horror and everything in between, Doug has an eclectic taste in films. Both a champion of independent cinema and a defender of more mainstream fare, he prefers to find an equal balance between two worlds often at odds with each other. A film critic by trade but a film fan at heart, Doug also writes for his own website The Jam Report, and Australia’s the AU review.

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